RAIN

The dark gloomy clouds hanging over the sky mark the beginning of my day. The silent steady pouring rain portrays the tears that my soul will shed in the hours to come. This body is once again an empty structure, lifeless, without any will to live, just biding its time in this prison called life, serving punishment for living. Once again, the eyes that held life and sparkle in them are empty, and confused where to look and how to look. Life itself seems to have lost purpose. All the hope and the dreams shattered like glass shatters after being hit by a stone and the broken pieces of it pierces my feet as I walk over them, drawing blood, but I feel no pain. I fell numb.

Looking out the window, the rain keeps up with its steady pace pouring its heart out, every now and then the clouds light up with lightening and a distant roar of thunder is heard preceded by it. As if the weather is fully aware of the tragedy befallen, the sky gives it grim condolences by pouring its heart out. It is a comfort knowing that someone else or rather something else is with me to mourn.

Looking down I see small children and some adults rejoicing at the much awaited arrival of rain, which to them brought with itself a break in the heat. I smile, a weak mocking smile, which turns in to a laugh. Here I am laughing at myself, at my fate. Who was to actually think and to expect that something good can happen to me, the whole past year was too good to imagine, and it cured me of the tragedy I had suffered. And yet here I am at square one. At the same situation where I was a whole year ago, lifeless and soul less. Every passerby looks at me and their looks pierces me making me feel even more worthless, it feels as if even they are mocking me. The whole universe is conspiring against me. Form the freshly washed leaves with droplets of water still on them; showing that they are fresh and clean, to the newly blossomed flowers with screaming vibrant colors. The rain has stopped now and a stream of sunlight bright and clean, washed by the rain pierces through the clouds and hits the land, bouncing off every water droplet making everything in view shimmer and sparkle. The rain, which I thought was my partner in pain, and sorrow, has now left a completely opposite mark on the land. A mark which tells me that all the world is and even brighter and happier place now and that I am once again all alone in this world, with no one to share the pain. Everyone has their own lives to live and he hustle and bustle of life starts and I withdraw myself from the window and retreat once again to m secluded spot where everyone leaves me alone. With me not able to handle the waves of happiness radiating from people around me and them not able to handle the grim and gloomy aura around me…..